Rihanna eats dinner and Brad Pitt gets a new T-shirt

What could it possibly mean that Rihanna and Chris Martin went out to dinner together? 1) They're having a torrid love affair. 2) They are working on a musical collaboration. 3) Gwyneth Paltrow told them to so that she may post a GOOP entry about consciously coupling her ex with another conscious being. 4) They were hungry at the same time.

Jennifer Lopez's now-ex Casper Smart reportedly didn't want to be known as "just her boyfriend” Henceforth, then, he shall be known as "just that guy who used to date a really hot superstar and now delivers your pizza."

Brad Pitt wears an adorable T-shirt with a drawing of himself and Angelina made by one of their children That explains why Gwyneth Paltrow this past week was heard yelling "What's wrong with you? Why don't you love me? What am I supposed to tell your trendy new stepmom, Rihanna?" at Apple and Moses.

Cressida Bonas, who dated Prince Harry and was this close to becoming a princess if she would have just bothered to comb her hair, has been cast in a movie starring Judi Dench and Matthew Morrison She'll play the girl who loads the pizzas into Casper Smart's car.

Performing at a concert, Miley Cyrus flung away a cardboard cut-out of Selena Gomez's face while singing the song "FU" Calm down everyone. It's not a feud or anything. "FU" stands for "Fly, Unbelievably beautiful friend person. I Fove U so much."

Kate Hudson says that "people have a right to [feel betrayed]" by her exes Lance Armstrong and Alex Rodriguez's predilection for performance-enhancing substances She, on the other hand, is just happy to no longer being asked to "pick up my prescription from Doctor Pills down behind the dumpster while I look at my glutes in the mirror."

James Franco publishes a terrible short story about how Lindsay Lohan really wanted to touch his underpants area and how he didn't want her to and had to hide so that she couldn't find him Lindsay Lohan responded with an essay titled "That Time James Franco Used me as Character in his Dumb Made-up Story and Didn't Even Give me a Shout-out on Twitter.” #CallMe."

Celebrity Math Question: If Chrissy Teigen and John Legend adopt a three-legged puppy and Audra McDonald wins a record-setting sixth Tony, is it true that Halle Berry has been ordered to pay $16,000 a month in child support? Answer: Yes, because Nickelback refused to give permission for their music to be used in 22 Jump Street and Michael Jackson's children receive an $8 million a year allowance. Bonus round: If Sigourney Weaver is returning for the three Avatar sequels even though her character died in the first movie, how many potential pizza delivery vehicles did Jennifer Lopez let Casper Smart keep? Four: Two motorcycles, a truck and a Jeep.